Wednesday, May 29, 2013

No pinch, no pinch!

This old commercial has been on my mind lately, because Little Man is driving me up a wall with his pinching.    He pinches all the time now, and it's starting to be a major concern for me.  If he's really excited, he'll grab you by the skin under your arm (don't act like you don't have chicken wings) and pinch.  Hard.  He has no concept yet of his own strength and every pinch is like he's practicing for that carnival game where you test your grip strength.

We're always careful when we excite him at home, because we've been used to his biting - the precursor to the excited pinch.  Trust me, one big chomp to your thigh during a tickle fest and you learn to protect yourself really quickly.  But as Grandma learned from experience last weekend, even a big bear hug can be too exciting and lead to a bruise the size of a lime under her arm.  Anger is the other emotion that can lead to a hard pinch, and he does not discriminate between himself or you when he gets really worked up.  Today at the grocery store he ended up pinching his own neck skin in a fit of anger that left a huge red mark.  The rest of the time he was pinching at me because he did not want me touching the cart handle for whatever reason.

With family it is easy to shrug off a bad pinch and/or warn them that something is about to set him off.  But lately as we take him out and about more and more, I'm worried that he is going to pinch the wrong person and upset someone.  Even more worrisome is that during one of his tantrums he'll hurt himself unintentionally.

So far the only solutions we have are squeals of "NO PINCHING" and/or pulling his hands away from his neck if he is trying to go for a pinch there.  If he's throwing a particularly bad tantrum we use a technique called a basket hold, where we wrap his arms around his chest and bear hug him for 30 seconds.  He hates it, and so it is supposed to make him not want to pinch again.  I don't know how much is getting through, but I know it's been a long, tedious process so far with very little in the way of results.

So if you see me with a few bruises this summer, rest assured everything is fine at home.  I'm just raising a kid who is part angry crab.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Is It Really Almost June?!

I can't believe June is about to arrive!  My third trimester is finally here and I'm waist-deep in preparations for Baby Vegas to make his appearance on the scene.  We've finished almost all of the To-Do List of things I wanted to accomplish before I get too pregnant to be of any help - the last big push will probably be this upcoming weekend when we clear out the old guest room.  Once that is done we get to paint and turn it into the nursery, so I cannot wait to finish up!!!  We got a 6' tall tree decal that is going to go on the wall, plus a few other decorations that will make our "Giving Tree" themed nursery really adorable.  Pinterest and Etsy are giving me a ton of ideas that I want to try too... but both of those sites are dangerous to anyone on a budget!  I want to buy all the things.

In the midst of the organizing, we took Little Man up north to an appointment with a sleep clinic.  Hubs and I both went into the day with high hopes, and we both left more than a little disappointed.  Basically we spent two hours retelling a behavioral psychiatrist and then a neurologist Little Man's entire medical history and sleep habits.  Then they both came back with all of the usual ideas that we've tried, tested, and had fail on us.  The only real information we got out of the day was that it might be a good idea to try melatonin after all, and that Little Man snores because he has slightly enlarged tonsils.   And really the screaming and kicking involved in finding the latter out was definitely not worth it.

Blurry cellphone photo of me and Little Man on the train for "Day Out With Thomas"  I'd have written about the day, but he was sick and grumpy.

I also ended up not auditioning for a show I really was hoping to audition for.  I had convinced myself up until last week that I could totally handle being pregnant and rehearsing for a show that would open less than a month after my due date.  Every single person I talked to about it seemed to think I was insane (perhaps a clue?), but I was sure I would be just fine - how hard would it be?!?!  Well then a few days before auditions I ended up getting the worst round ligament pains I've ever felt.  They were bad enough that even trying to stand up straight left me completely breathless.  I knew it was probably because I'd been running around like a madwoman trying to finish household projects and not taking the time to rest and hydrate like I normally do.  So I reluctantly admitted to Hubs that I can't do everything and that I would skip this one.  I was so bummed out and grouchy for the entire weekend thinking about missing out on yet another show, but in the end I know it was for the best.  Making a selfish decision would have felt great in the short term, but come August when the baby arrived I knew I'd be kicking myself for not setting aside more time for our home and family.  I'm still working on squelching the green-eyed monster feeling I have going on as people talk about how much fun it will be working on shows all summer.  I think it will be easier once I get a little rounder and unable to move without groaning - then I'll be so glad I don't have to leave the house I'll probably laugh if you remind me about how I was upset about not being able to rehearse three days a week in the heat of the summer!!

Until then though the next few weekends will be insanely busy - we have plans at least one day every weekend until July!  I can't wait to spend time in this beautiful weather with my friends and family.  I was a little worried that we'd have nothing to do on the weekends since a lot of our summer weekends usually revolve around concerts and wine festivals that aren't especially pregnant-lady friendly, but I should have known better.  Just because I can't party like a rockstar doesn't mean I won't be partying at all!

Before heading out to a pool party to kick off the summer!

Thursday, May 16, 2013

But What If I Fall Off A Roof??!

As any pregnant woman will tell you, a lot of the crappy part of pregnancy is the worrying. There are the major worries of course, which I don't even need to mention because honestly, if you haven't thought of them yet I don't want to remind you about them. There are also the "I read too much of the baby book and now anything can happen" worries. You freak out over deli-meat and soft cheeses, and whether all the wine you drank before you found out you were pregnant is going to mean low SAT scores for your baby genius.  Are you getting too fat, or too thin?  Am I "prone to stretch marks"?  What if I sleep on my right side instead of my left? What if you vomit during your glucose test because that juice is disgusting?  What if my water breaks while I'm in the bathtub and I don't even notice?!  What if, what if, what if...

On one hand, I've noticed the worrying decreases significantly with a second pregnancy.  Specifically, those irrational worries.  For example... I'm hungry. Give me that Subway sandwich before I rip your face off, bacteria be damned!    Oh and look, I'd forgotten about those stretch marks until now, I guess they're back...

I've mentioned before I adore my OB, and he spends every minute of our seven minute monthly visit entertaining all of my questions - from the serious to the truly ridiculous.  I leave feeling confident and pleased that my baby is healthy and I am apparently amazing. 

There is one worry that I can't shake though, and no matter how many times I rephrase the same question I can't seem to get a satisfying answer.  It reminds me of the scene in the Tim Allen movie "The Santa Clause" where he is talking to his elves in the workshop.  To enlighten those of you who need a refresher on this 1994 classic - he's being walked through all the new developments the elves have made throughout the year to ensure his ultimate safety as the new Santa Claus.  A new flame retardant suit, a fancy communication system, jetpacks... he's ready for his first season as the Claus.  Except, poor Scott Calvin wants to know what happens if he falls off a roof?!  After all, that is what got him here in the first place, and why he's so worried about safety to begin with... so why isn't anyone working on something that will keep him from falling off a roof?  The elves shrug off the worry and the problem is never really solved.

That story sums up how I feel every time I go into a doctor's office.  I know that my doctors have done every test possible to try and discover why Little Man was born full-term with a brain hemorrhage that they normally only see in preemies.  They've checked me down to the genes, and they've given Baby Vegas extra long and detailed ultrasounds.  But there is no answer to why things happened the way they did for Little Man, and so there is no way of predicting if it could happen again to Baby Vegas.  The best answer to my fears is "It probably won't happen again."  Little Man was most likely a lightening strike, a one-in-a-million.  They told me in the NICU that he was only the 2nd full term baby they'd seen with a Grade IV IVH.  Ever.  At one of the best hospitals in the nation.  That same hospital told me they simply have no answers for "why?"  It just happened.

So... there is no way to prepare for it to happen again.  I simply have to go through this pregnancy, terrified that I will "fall off the roof". I can pray, I can hope, I can take all the tests and eat my vitamins.  That is all I can do. Odds are good that I will finish this pregnancy with a healthy and happy baby.  I appreciate every doctor and friend who has reassured me with positive feedback about my pregnancy so far.    But if you ever see the crazy, panicked look in my eyes, it's probably because I'm desperately wishing that anyone could reassure me that I'm never going to fall off a roof again.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

This Is Very Suspicious...

I seem to have picked up a cold, in the middle of beautiful May weather.  Where could this cold have come from?  I need to do some detective work...

Well, Little Man does seem out of sorts...

So maybe I got it from him when he insisted on me giving him bites of my raisin bread for breakfast, despite that he had a fistful of his own bread.

Or maybe when he came over to where I was minding my own business reading blogs just to give me a snuggle... and then wiped his runny nose all across my jeans.

Or maybe when he saw my Dunkin Donuts smoothie sitting on the table and he slobbered all over the straw trying to get a sip.  And then I decided that I might as well drink it anyways, because it was a full smoothie dammit and they're expensive!!

What about that time that he was sitting on my laugh and I made him laugh so hard he couldn't stop coughing directly into my face?

Or the time he sneezed on me so violently that I had to sponge off my arms.

There is the fact that I have been chasing him around the house begging him to let me aspirate his nose or for the love of Pete let me wipe the snot off you before you rub it all over the furniture like an angry snail!!!

But... this has to be a different cold than what Little Man has, I'm sure of it.  Because he's running around the house like a kid on speed, pausing only to make more snail trails or beg for more orange juice and gummy vitamins.  And I am laid up on the couch, drinking tea and trying to convince myself that pizza for dinner for the 3rd time in 5 days isn't a terrible idea...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Just a Bottle Full of Sugar...

Ugh.  I cannot express in words how much I hate the glucose test you have to take for gestational diabetes.  I already have a horrible gag reflex - combine that with not eating my usual carb-filled lunch and a thick fruit punch flavored sugary syrup and you've got a recipe for dry heaving.

The rest of the appointment went quickly.  At 25 weeks 3 days, I'm up +9 lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight, and the baby's heartbeat is nice and strong.  I only get one more monthly visit and then we're on to the every-other-week and weekly ones.  They freaked me out today and scheduled appointments all the way til 3 days after my due date, which made me shudder a little thinking of how doooooone with pregnancy I'll feel then.

After the glucose test I got tacos and root beer as my reward for a job well done.  Somehow Hubs got a taco too, I guess as a reward for dealing with my freaking out all day winning personality.  Hmmm.  Someone got the better end of the deal there.

Shortly after this picture was taken, the Old Navy flip flops were retired.  May they RIP.

The last few days we've been trying to figure out what is wrong with Little Man.  He woke up on Thursday and Friday nights screaming bloody murder and nothing could console him for over an hour.  The last time he did something like that (Sept 2011) we ended up taking him to the ER and finding out a week later it was a shunt malfunction, so of course I was terrified that we were in for a repeat.  Luckily (Erm. I guess?) on Sunday morning he woke up with a runny nose and cough, so it is looking like maybe he just hadn't been feeling too hot and it is gonna be a bad cold.  Ex took him for a day visit on Sunday anyways though, since it had been ten weeks since he last saw Little Man.  Then that night he came home and puked all over his bed in his sleep.  Gross, but at least then I could attribute the crankiness and late night wakeups to something more concrete - he felt yuck.  So now we're just in the stuffy/runny nose and sleeping late stage of the cold, and Little Man never complains when he doesn't feel well so it is pretty much business as usual with a side of Boogie Wipes.  I hate that every illness immediately has me jumping to "Ohmygod, is this an ER visit?", but since the symptoms of shunt malfunction are nearly identical to those of a bad flu, that's life for the next few years and/or until he can talk and tell us his head hurts.

In case I don't see you... Happy Mother's Day weekend to all the mothers out there!  If you're thinking gifts, I enjoy a good cinnamon bun, bubble baths, and tulips are my favorite flower.