Blogging Wednesday? Let's try it.

It's Wednesday, which I think I will designate as "Blog Day" from here on out to get back into a writing pattern. Wednesday is the morning I have the most free time, since Vegas and Little Man are both in school for full days and I don't usually have errands midweek.

Little Man is chugging along post-Botox injection. It was a quick and easy appointment, albeit long because the doctor is over two hours away. His PT says she's seen some minor improvements in his foot and ankle, but the muscle is still so tight that you can actually see the bone poking the skin up on the top of his foot. We're hoping to get in for a serial casting appointment sooner rather than later, and we also have Botox appointments every three months to keep the muscles from tensing up.

And in other exciting (erm, I guess?) news, we switched diaper brands for Little Man. We'd been sticking with the brand Medicaid used to provide him and they were... well, cheap. I mean, not cheap, cause adult diapers are not cheap. But cheapest and they seemed to do their job. Well after several months of wet mornings and shredded diapers we decided to try a new brand. I don't know why I'm shocked they're so drastically better, but I really didn't think an extra five to ten dollars an order would improve the quality so much. I don't think many of you are in a position where you are looking for adult diapers but if you are, I'd recommend Slimline Tranquility.

Vegas and Little Man are both in school now. Little Man could care less, Vegas is pumped. Most especially because he can ride the school bus two days a week. The days he has full days in his private school are my favorite (so much glorious free time!), and he loves them too, but really nothing compares to the wonderfulness that is a bus ride with his neighborhood best bud. And thank goodness for that kid, because otherwise I wouldn't have been able to get Vegas on the bus at all that first day of school! Now I'm lucky if I get a wave before he runs up to the driver and aide to say 'goo-mornin', how you today?!'

Cheeseball and I are adjusting to the quiet time at home. We have our living room completely gated off to keep the boys from running crazy when we don't want them to, but on the days its just us I try to let him roam free to discover what parts of my house need better childproofing. Spoiler alert, it's the Tupperware drawer and the toilet bowl. He's really into socks and shoes right now too so I am spending a lot of the morning helping him put them off and on again. He had a meeting with Infants and Toddlers last week about his speech development, and we got the great news that his speech has improved so much that he will probably not need therapy after this school year. He's going to be observed and monitored a few times until Christmas, but the OT was really impressed by his progress over the summer!

And as for me - I'm suddenly back in school too! I woke up the other day and couldn't let go of the idea of going back to school to relearn ASL and possibly get my interpreting certification. [dearest Hubs, so sorry I decided this at two am and woke you up for a serious discussion of this idea ;)] I know myself well enough to take it slow and not overcommit to a program I may not be as passionate about in six months time, so for right now I'm just starting with some basic classes. With my theater schedule and the kids I have to decide if this is something I want to make a priority - especially as it would become very expensive to commute to a school that would be able to help me achieve my ultimate goals. This semester will be a good way to decide what I want to do and what I can handle. Either way, I'm super excited about being back in a classroom again for the first time in... nine years!? Wow.

And that's as much update as I can squeeze in before I have to make lunches and get the kiddo down for a nap.

School Daze

Two weeks left until school starts. I'm waiting with baited breath... It's not just my kids that thrive on routine!!

Little Man will be in school full time. We haven't started the fight yet, but I am already predicting a tough year for him/us. His behavior has gotten really intense this summer. I use "intense" because he's not "bad", it's not a purposeful choice. He's just frustrated all the time and overreacts at the drop of a hat, and it manifests as huge blow-out tantrums for hours on hours. His hitting has gotten bad enough that he's managed to bruise himself a few times and now he's starting to lash out at his brothers if they get in his way. So once school is back in session I plan to call for an IEP to request not only the PT that they've taken away and he desperately needs again, but a behavioral therapist/ABA as well. If necessary, I want him bussed to a school that can provide more intensive help. It's been awhile since I've been this worried about him, and I think he's at a pretty critical point where if we don't get him help soon, he will fall into really bad patterns that I won't be able to break.

Vegas will be on a weird school schedule. 3 days a week of full day private school, 2 days a week of half-days at public school. He qualified for public school five days a week, but we decided he needed to stay his private school where he has made such huge improvements and is so comfortable. He's basically going to the local school for speech therapy and for specials like music and PE. He also got a waiver to go to the same school as Little Man, so they will ride the bus together two days a week! I'm probably going to explode from cute that first day.

And Cheeseball and I are staying home full time. Lots of quality one on one bonding and we're probably going to sign up for Mommy and Me gymnastics and swimming lessons. Cheeseball has so much energy and is very different developmentally than Vegas was at 2 years old. I think he'll really love the attention and the classes, he loves being a big kid and exploring so it will be right up his alley.

My favorite part of school starting again is that I plan to get more serious about taking care of my physical and mental health. More writing, more exercising, more meal-planning and cleaning (which actually is not work for me, I love it and it keeps my emotions more level). An organized home and healthy body is my ultimate dream. To get that started I signed up for a meal kit delivery service and some online subscriptions to keep the diapers and milk coming regularly. Plus I even splurged for a couple fun phone apps for exercise plans and good music. 

Just two more weeks. TWO WEEKS! For now... I have to go figure out how to lock the blinds to prevent the kids from looking directly into the sun.

Little Man Hates Dentist, Vegas Loves Food

Little Man's dental appointment has been pushed back so many times it's embarrassing.  The first time we tried to take him was over a year ago, and while filling out the medical form I naively added "by the way, he has a shunt" line to the medical issues part.  Turns out with a shunt that they don't clean your teeth without prior approval from a doctor.  Whoops.  So his teeth were counted, looked fine, and I called it a dentist win.  I rescheduled and canceled several times because every time the appointment came up again, I'd forgotten to talk to his neurosurgeon.  After intense prodding from his social worker this summer, I re-re-re-scheduled the visit, only to forget again.  Sensing a theme?  But this time I got on the phone with neurology and got everything taken care of in less than an hour. Except it was 1 hour after his appointment time.  Sigh.

So finally yesterday was the big day!  We got to the dentist, and of course we had been mislabeled as a regular ole kid who can get his teeth cleaned by a nice little old lady.  After a gentle reminder (and 30 minutes), we got a strapping young doctor and strong dental hygienist who could help me pin the kid down while his teeth were cleaned. I still got kicked in the kidney several times, as I was designated "hand-holder". On the bright side, he was given a thumbs up on the clean, straight teeth. Then I was warned that six-year molars are on their way.  Yikes!

We raced back home to get Little Man off to kindergarten, which meant Vegas skipped lunch while Little Man ate a danish in the car. Mom points for that one, I know. I quickly realized that Vegas was not enjoying watching Little Man eat and not having lunch, but since Vegas is a little on the messy side, I was S.O.L. on what to feed him as we drove. A half-hour of wailing later, I caved and tossed an applesauce squeeze to him in a church parking lot.  I figured, what the hell, he'll either be covered in applesauce or get a bite to eat. Surprisingly enough, he grasped the squeeze and sip solo concept pretty fast, ate the whole thing, and was dying for more.  Two more parking lot pull overs later and he fell asleep as we pulled into Little Man's school.  Of course.

When we got home from dropping off Little Man, Vegas ate a hard boiled egg, 1/4 cup of olives, a cheesestick, and half a mango before passing out again.  That kid can eat!!

Today we are finally off to get the last few issues in my car looked at before I never shop at that dealership again.  I've had so much trouble with them I could scream.  And I have, several times. Wish us luck!

Now What Do We Do For The Rest Of Summer?

Little Man had his last day of summer camp yesterday.  I was thrilled at the idea of getting a few extra minutes of sleep in the morning, but then reality set in - the kids wake up whether there is camp or not!  My alarm didn't go off this morning, but I still woke up at 7:15 on the dot to get everyone downstairs and our day started.

We only have two weeks until school starts, but I am not really looking forward to the weekdays. I know I won't get nearly as much done during the day. I also know that too much contact between Little Man and Vegas gives Little Man a case of the "ohmygodshutthatkidup".  Especially now that Vegas can babble and follow Little Man all around the house.  I don't know who to feel sorry for - the big kid who needs quiet and alone time without being overstimulated by a squealing toddler, or the little kid who thinks everything his big brother does is awesome and he wants to be right next to him all day long.

Speaking of toddler, Vegas is almost one year old!  Just in the last few weeks he's been making physical leaps - he now uses his Thomas train as a walker to toddle all over the house, stands alone for a few minutes at a time, and has mastered the sippy cup!  I found out the last one when I heard the familiar sound of milk being tugged out of a sippy, and realized it was Vegas taking a big gulp out of Little Man's milk cup. Whoops.  So yesterday we started weaning him off formula and I don't think there is going to be a problem there at all.  He loves his nighttime bottle, but I think that is more of a comfort thing than a nourishment at this point.  He eats so much food now too, and he has no dislikes yet - so his diet is pretty varied and healthy. I've also felt pretty strongly throughout his babyhood that I would let him help guide me in what he was ready to eat and how much he'd like - no rushing him into solids and when he was hungry, we'd eat.  He really preferred/could best handle purees for the longest time and just now has started being able to swallow and tolerate firmer chunks of food. I feel like we've gone from 0-60 in food options overnight!!!  Yesterday for dinner he had avocado, banana, broccoli, carrots, lima beans, and rice cakes and a half cup of water!

This was after a nectarine massacre.
Did you know it is really hard to peel a nectarine?!

Last month we found a sweet portrait deal online for a 16x16 gallery canvas and 40% off any additional sheets of photos for only $16.  So we scheduled some first year photos for Vegas, since Little Man is... less than enthusiastic about photo shoots (plus he will get school photos in a few weeks).  On the other hand, Vegas is always serious and contemplative when in a new place, so it was still really tough to get some smiles and poses out of him.  But we persevered and got several cute shots of him that should be here just in time for his giant birthday bash!! I can't wait to show them off -I'm such a proud momma.

A photo of the website storing previews of photos.
I'm so tech savvy.
 

We had arranged for the end of the photo shoot to be a cake smash. Vegas was not at all amused. He was very grossed out by the idea of smashing his hands into cake, and just tried to run away the entire time.  I tried to "help" by placing his hands in the cake and swiping some frosting on his lip.  No dice - now he was just dirty and trying to run away. Oh well - we've got another chance for cake photos at his party.  Little Man was such a pro at his cake smash, I think I got spoiled.

He was seriously the cutest cake smasher I've ever seen.

And that about wraps up the last couple of weeks.  Vegas' eczema cleared up with the medicated cream they gave us.  I was diagnosed with TMJ six minutes after walking into the ENT's office.  Little Man has been healthy and has the best suntan out of all of us - he looks like a little Coppertone baby commercial.  Camp kept him outside and wore him out every day, and I think it was a great experience for him.

Time to get back to organized chaos...

Beep Beep - Get Out of the Way, my Mom-Van is approaching!

Life has been a whirlwind the last few weeks.  Every two years I work as an election judge and so I have to go to training class and set ups for that sweet gig.  This year I was working the early voting days as well, so we had to find childcare for all five of the days I was out of the house "working" (I use the term loosely, it's definitely not the hardest job I've ever done).  Of course, since life never runs smoothly when you need it to - Hubs was told he'd be on travel for work during the exact week I needed him home to watch the kids.  In another state, many miles away.  So we cashed in all our points and did a little begging, and my mom and the in-laws banded together to take care of the kids that week.  It was insane, and more than a little stressful for everyone involved.  But we powered through! I'm going to get a nice paycheck for my trouble, and Hubs even got a work promotion while this was all going down!!

Also because I'm slightly insane, I decided on Monday that come hell or high water I am trading in my little car.  Right now I drive a Cobalt, and it is just big enough for me and the two boys.  If you try and add someone in the front seat though, forget it.  Your chair has to be completely forward and upright, and it's just really uncomfortable.  When Hubs' car started acting funny a couple months ago and we had to cram into mine for a trip out to dinner, I was a miserable grouch the entire way because I couldn't get comfortable.  For whatever reason I'd held off on the pressing need for a trade-in until I got an email about great interest rates on Monday morning, and it was like a dam broke.  I was on the phone with my car dealership an hour later, and made an appointment to get my car appraised in the shop within six hours.  By hour eight I had selected a pre-owned minivan, and committed my not-even-written-yet paycheck to the cause.  Yep.  Of course, I'm not a complete idiot, and since I know next to nothing about cars I did not purchase my "dream van" that day.  So this Friday we are scooting up to the dealership, and hopefully my amazing and wonderful husband will be approving this purchase.  A respectable four days from when I decided to trade in my youth and energy to become an official minivan mom.  And I'm not even the least bit sorry about it.  I've actually been having reoccurring dreams about the glorious amount of trunk space and how easy it will be getting the boys in and out and keeping them rear-facing longer.   

Sometimes adulthood sneaks up on you, but this time it feels like I ran out and grabbed it.

Just Being "Normal"

I am nervous to write the words down - but things are going suspiciously great right now.

LIFE IS GOOD!

Well enough that I feel good writing about it without worrying I'll jinx it somehow.  Little Man comes home from school every day nice and exhausted and ready to relax with us.  We've gotten into a great routine where he walks over to the dinner table when he gets hungry and we sit down to dinner together.  He goes to bed by 9:30 and stays in his room semi-quietly until we get up together for a bath before school at 7:30 in the morning. We've manufactured a new duct-tape belt and anklet set that prevents diaper removal that has been working for over a month.  He's progressed in his usage of the iPad to make some choices with food or television.  He's been more affectionate and open with us and his extended family.

Super fancy duct tape system.  And serious bed-head.

The only thing out of the norm we've done recently has been a "quick" (Hahah- with travel it was a 6 hour day) appointment for a baseline MRI for Little Man. His neurosurgeon assured me that Little Man wouldn't need sedation for the procedure, and I assured him that if he thought he'd get Little Man sitting still for ten minutes that he was batshit crazy.  We were both wrong I guess, because Little Man did manage to get his MRI done without sedation, he just needed Hubs laying across his chest in the machine with him. Which sounds like it would be really stressful and scary, and maybe it was - but Hubs took it like a champ and said it "wasn't that bad".  He did admit that stuffing two people in an MRI machine, one of those people wiggling and screaming bloody murder, was possibly a little claustrophobic.  Still, better than we expected for sure.

My big kid, looking little for a moment.

After the MRI was an appointment with his surgeon turn back on the shunt.  I didn't realize that they technically don't turn it off before the MRI starts, they just adjust it afterwards since the machine changes the magnetic setting of his shunt. The appointment was quick and easy, although when the doctor read the MRI he said that Little Man's baseline still shows more fluid than normal around his brain.  Basically his new MRI looked very similar to the one he had during his shunt failure in 2011, which was a little disconcerting to me. The doctor didn't seem overly concerned but he did tell us that if the shunt failed again there would be no real way to tell unless Little Man displayed symptoms (ie; another year of nightly vomiting episodes).  Of course, that morning before the MRI we'd noticed Little Man's breath was a little gross, and he spent the weekend afterwards being sick and pukey, so we're on high alert wondering if everything is okay with his shunt.  But he went to school today and seems to be on the upswing, so I think it might have just been a bug.  *Crossing fingers*

Doesn't that sound like life is totally normal and great?   I guess maybe my baseline for what is normal might also be a little skewed.   But the MRI was genuinely nothing but an expensive and fancy checkup, because things are going *deep breath and holding* really well.

Not to be left out, Baby Vegas is also doing fabulous.  He's been eating two or three meals of puree a day now, and loves him some puffs and rice crackers.  He doesn't crawl anywhere, he usually scoots on his butt until he reaches whatever he wants - which lately is the laptop cord or the television remote.  During the time Little Man is at school we watch our two favorite shows, The Daily Show and Colbert Report, and then turn off the tv for a long morning nap.  After we wake up we just hang out and play quietly together all day long. His face just lights up whenever he sees his Daddy come home from work or hears him on the phone, and he definitely has him wrapped around his chubby little finger.  He rarely cries or fusses, and I only know he's teething because he has had the worst runny nose for the last few weeks. Oh and the two teeth that have shown up!   He sleeps through the night from 9:30 to 7:30, every so often having a night where he wakes up and fusses for his pacifier to be put back in. It has been a marvelously normal and average babyhood so far for this little guy, and I'm loving every minute of it.  I love being home with him, watching him grow and learn. I love being the Mommy to two amazing little boys. 

Shopping, everyone does it.

Yes - Life is (our) normal.  We're doing great.  I'm trying to enjoy this time without worrying that the other shoe is going to drop and things will go back to crazy.  But if you'll excuse me, I have no time to worry right now, it's naptime over here!

I've got NO problems with the rain

Seriously, none.  If it rained for a week instead of snowing one more day, I'm one hundred percent okay with that.  Having Little Man at home and off his normal school schedule is a train wreck waiting to happen. Plus the cleanup is a little ridiculous...

Our evil beloved cat Maximus is just waiting to be squeezed

And check out those teeth marks on the back of the toy box.  Yep, that used to be up in his room before we realized he was slowly crushing the plastic into sharp points.

Baby Vegas' face has slowly been healing up the past few days.  I mentioned his eczema a few posts ago, which had been kind of awful at his last doctor's appointment.  It must have been itching him because suddenly he woke up one morning covered in scratches and it looked terrible.

This wasn't even the worst it ended up looking. Ughhh!

We started using Aquaphor on the advice of his pediatrician and it has worked miracles!  His face has completely cleared up and he is back to having cute chubby baby cheeks again - no steroids necessary. It is a double bonus because we are planning on starting solids in the next few days.  The pediatrician also warned that eczema was one of those possible indicators of allergic reaction to foods, so I am glad we're starting with a clean slate.  He has had a tiny bite of carrot puree and he absolutely hated the experience (or possibly carrots) so it hasn't been a crazy rush to push solids.  As Hubs said, "If that face is what solid food tastes like, I'd never eat again."

I let Hubs take the photos and he missed the best faces.
Next time Mommy gets the camera!

This past weekend was insanely busy. Friday we headed to Babies R Us looking for two big ticket items after trading in two expired car seats we'd been holding onto for the trade-in sale.  If Vegas was a few months younger I think we would've gotten the 4Moms rocker thing, it was so mesmerizing Hubs could not walk away from the demo.  Instead we got a Graco MyRide 70 for my car, and a jogging stroller for the springtime that with clearance and coupons we ended up getting for half-price!  We always underestimate how long it takes us to pick out any baby item, and so our "quick trip" ended up being closer to 3 hours!! We looked at our watches and realized we'd have to drop everything and race home to meet Little Man's school bus! Luckily my amazing father-in-law was home and dropped what he was doing to pick up Little Man... Having family live so close is awesome, I don't know what we'd do without them.

Then Saturday was one of my favorite couple's baby shower, and we took both boys.  Vegas was a big hit, and loved getting loved on by all the mommas at the party.  He is such a quiet and observant little guy, he just sat on laps and looked around until he fell asleep.  Little Man on the other hand pretty much stayed in the corner watching his DVD with Hubs (he is such a champ). We made it three hours before Little Man's DVD player died and then he was done with the party - which was to be expected and we were very proud of him.

Originally thought we'd head to a Superbowl party on Sunday, but Little Man was so worn out from the day before we didn't want to push it.  He spent a lot of the morning tantruming and feeling out-of-sorts, and had a couple of meltdowns before we ended up convincing him it was time for a late nap.  The only tough part about trying to socialize him more is that sometimes we push him too hard and we end up paying for it the next day.  Huge changes in routine just don't sit well with him.  Which brings us full circle to my first point - I'll take weeks of rain over random days off of school for snow ANYTIME.  This kid loves his routine, and Momma loves her sanity!

There Are All Kinds of Routines

I've found a sweet rhythm in our morning routine.  We wake up at 7:30. Well, to be clear I wake up at 7:30, poor Hubs is already out the door for work by then!  I get the Little Man dressed and set up with cereal and his tv show, or he gets therapy if it is a Wed/Thurs, then I feed Vegas his morning bottle.  He is sleeping from 10:30 to 7:30 now that he is in his big boy crib which means we're all enjoying a fairly good night's sleep. By the time Vegas finishes eating, it is time to get some teeth brushed, face washed, and throw the lunch I've packed the night before into Little Man's backpack. Then we walk down the driveway to wait for the bus.  I usually bring the rest of his breakfast with us and he happily eats that while we watch the other neighborhood kids walk to their bus stop and leave for school.  I savor this short wait with my happy Little Man, when he wants nothing more than to giggle and run around with me, where his patience and energy level are usually the best they will be all day.

I come inside and watch Colbert and Stewart while having my coffee and breakfast, and then its time for chores and catching up on whatever I missed last night on the internet.  Once a week, usually Tuesday or Wednesday, I go grocery shopping.  But our daytime is fairly quiet and blissfully uneventful.  Vegas is an easygoing baby, and aside from his tendency to only nap in 15-20 minute increments, is an absolute dream.  He's either swinging, eating, or hanging out in his gym.  Or getting snuggled on - I'd missed having a squishy little baby around!

His easy nature is helpful, because Little Man has become a total pill at night for the past few weeks.  Maybe it is the loss of naptime now that he is in school.  Maybe it is the realization that home is not nearly as structured as school, and that he can push boundaries here with us.  Whatever it is, after school is now the most stressful time of Little Man's day.  That means that from 4:45 - 9:30 is usually the most stressful part of MY day, because there is certainly no perfect rhythm to our after school/nighttime routines.

Once Little Man gets off the bus, he is usually so exhausted that I walk/drag him up the driveway and get his coat and leg brace off to settle down for afternoon snack.  He is also always ravenously hungry (which is weird, I know they have snacks at school and he has a huge lunch), and flips out if snack and dinner don't come in quick succession.  Every time I step into the kitchen, he panics and immediately needs to be given a snack.  If I tell him that there is no junk food til after dinner, it is full out tantrum time.  His tantrums have gotten so bad that he now does the typical toddler "lay down and flail around kicking" thing - with a few added special kid bonuses.  He smacks his chest so hard that he leaves bruises and scratches all over himself.  Sometimes he pinches at the skin on his neck.  He cries so hard that he loses his voice.  He chews on the feet or zipper of his pajamas.  He intersperses tantrums with flopping down onto Daddy or Mommy to just cuddle for a few minutes.  Or watching his shows.  Or chewing on toys.

Needless to say after a few hours of these kind of tantrums we are excited for bedtime.  We put him upstairs in his room and he usually settles right down to sleep.  The problem now is that there is literally nothing we can do to keep his diaper and pajamas on anymore.  Nothing.  He has no problem at all if he stays dry.  But if he pees and wakes up wet he takes off his pajamas and diaper and goes back to sleep naked, and this happens at least twice a week.  Even with an extra fastener to keep the zipper closed, he just hulks out of the zipper and rips the pajamas open, leaving the fastener on top and wearing the pajamas like a cape.  This routine means a setback in the morning - an early morning half-asleep bath and frantic scramble to be ready for the day.  But this is actually a best case scenario if I walk into the room and see the jammies off.

God forbid the kid makes a dirty diaper. This almost always happens at night before he falls asleep for good. I have no words to describe how disgusting it is to clean up a full sized boy's diaper, when all you want to do is crawl in bed and pass out in exhaustion.  Give me all the baby diaper blowouts in the world - they don't even phase me anymore. The tough part is that it doesn't matter what we do - we can check on Little Man every half-hour after bed, and the kid will magically poop the second our back is turned.  It takes all my energy not to flip out at him and scream.  Logically I know that the reason he takes off his diaper is because its gross to sit in a dirty diaper.  I understand that to him, it is off and now he is happy and wait, why is Mommy so angry that I am 'clean' and dry?   And now, he gets a late night bath.  HURRAY everything is awesome in Little Man's world!  Mommy and Daddy are the ones bleary-eyed scrubbing the bedroom and kidlet at 10:30.

This is my most dreaded of all our routines. We have a lifetime supply of Resolve and Lysol wipes and Clorax spray thanks to Costco.  The washer does a nighttime load and in the morning we throw a soggy pile of bedclothes into the dryer.  We move through these motions on autopilot.  We applaud ourselves on the nights we find Little Man in the process of tearing open the pajamas, we sigh in exasperation on the nights we miss our window.  There are half-hearted lectures to Little Man about never doing this again and a stern goodnight and back to bed.  Then Vegas finally gets his moment of peace and quiet (because Little Man usually goes back to sleep after removing a diaper, and is very. upset. at being woken up to be cleaned up), and we scarf down a late bottle before being tucked into bed.

Routine.  It's all routines at this point.  Some of them I like more than others.

So much for posting every day

Today is the 50th day of school in our county, so Little Man's class is celebrating with a 50's dance complete with root beer floats and hot dogs.  It should be fairly hilarious because A) a kindergarten dance?  And B) Little Man hates ice cream and carbonated beverages.  But I dutifully dressed him in his greaser costume and tried to slick back his mop of hair before school... it turned out more flock of seagulls than greaser, but I think I got an A for effort.

To add to my morning craziness, every day for the next two weeks he is supposed to be in a different color outfit for their color unit. This is after I spent all last week dressing him in outfits for "Spirit Week".  Considering he could care less what he wears, it's really a pain in the ass.  But I feel like if I don't do it, then the other moms and teachers will judge me for not caring about this super fun Color Unit.  *Sigh*  So I am organizing a bunch of special outfits for this week and he will be the cutest and most involved kid in his class.  

We all had a great extended Halloween weekend!  Saturday was lunch with my grandmother-in-law and a costume party with some of my favorites. Then yesterday we invited some more friends over to watch scary movies and eat our leftover candy.  Hubs laughed with me later that I never really held Baby Vegas for more than a minute or so all night - he was everyone's favorite party guest.

Last but certainly not least - I finally started my exercise program again!  I am hoping I can keep up with it, and I know that I can as long as I put my mind to it.  I love how great I feel when I'm keeping up with my workouts and eating well, and it is always a nice bonus to see the pounds drop off.  My goal is to lose 15 pounds by January.  All about willpower.

My Little Hero

Little Man has been in school now for a month - and it has been pretty much the best thing ever.  I spend lots of quality time with Baby Vegas during the day, and Little Man is loving school.  I think.  He comes home every day exhausted but calm - and eager to get back in front of his tv with an afternoon snack.  But no tears or tantrums at school or on the bus, so that counts as a win in my book!

His Parent/Teacher conference was this Monday, and his teacher had nothing but positive things to say about his transition into school.  He loves books and has a couple favorite reading spots in the room where he goes to stim and "read" with them - similar to what he does at home.  His therapists say that when he grabs a book it usually means he is done with sitting still and needs to unwind from the lesson.  He is getting better with doing tasks (putting blocks in a container, taking them out) for longer bursts of time too.  There is a smartboard in his class that he really likes, so they are thinking that they want to work with him on the iPad as his communication tool in the classroom. 

His private therapy lessons have continued at home too - he gets PT and OT once a week before school.  It makes Wednesday and Thursday mornings very intense for me, because I am trying to juggle getting the therapist anything she needs, taking care of Vegas, and getting Little Man's school bag ready.  Sometimes I have to drag Little Man out of bed if he's been up all morning and fallen back to sleep.  Or I have to rush him into a quick shower if he peed through his diaper or (ughhh) took it off during the night.  Then later I usually have to remind the therapist that we need to book it out of the door for him to catch the bus.  Today was the first day we were nearly late - as we walked out the door with the therapist to our "bus stop" (the end of the driveway) I saw the bus making its way down our road.  Despite the hectic mornings though I think his private therapy is too valuable for him to stop, and with him not getting home until 4:30 in the afternoon it has to be mornings.

Getting ready to leave for school!  Shoes off for the car ride (this was pre-bus)

 

His private OT and PT are using the mornings to work on basic tasks like getting into his car-seat on his own, walking up and down the hill and bus stairs, or dressing and feeding himself breakfast.  OT is also pushing to start a therapeutic listening program because the noise getting on the bus is still very overwhelming to him.  At $900 to start that though, we aren't sure when or if that will happen.  Not to mention the very basic problem that with his sensory issues Little Man refuses to wear headphones unless you are holding onto both of his hands.  That would make for a painful 30 minutes for Momma.

Hubs and Little Man walking home from the "bus stop"
 



If I am being totally honest though, my favorite part of Little Man starting school is seeing him mature into a "big boy".  I thought that would be the hardest part for me, with his special needs he has always been my baby, even as I watched him mature physically.  But now every morning instead of staying in his special jammies, I get to pick out a "big kid" outfit.  He takes his Ninja Turtle backpack to the end of the driveway where he waits like a big kid for the bus.  And then he climbs the stairs holding the rails and his para's hand, and walks confidently onto the bus - he doesn't even look back anymore. 

Alright.  It might be my favorite part, but writing that made me tear up a little.  My baby is in there somewhere you know...

Coffee, Cuddles, and a Rant about a Bus

Today is the first day in three weeks that I haven't had to rush around the house, stuff the newborn into his carseat after a hurried bottle, and drag a reluctant kindergartner into the car and off to school.  We finally got transportation worked out and he's taking the school bus like a big boy, which makes Mommy a little misty-eyed.

Of course, nothing ever works out perfectly for Little Man.  Some administrator didn't check off the box on his transportation forms that says he qualifies for a pickup at his front door - so instead we had to walk ten minutes (the kid walks slow) down the road to a "bus stop" in our neighborhood.  Where he is the only one being picked up.  Did I mention the bus passes our house on the way to this bus stop?  And as I'm walking away from the bus stop with my infant in the stroller, the bus whizzes away past our house a full five minutes (I walk faster without the kid) before I drag our sorry butts back there?

Oy.  Hopefully everything works out in the next couple of days.  His afternoon bus driver called and said she realized the stupidity of the bus stop situation and would be dropping him off at our driveway.  But that he wouldn't be dropped off til 4:45, even though school ends at 3:30.  Whaaaaat?!?!   School is 15 minutes from my house if I drive slowly.  That seems insane to me.  I gather that getting 6 or 7 special needs kids onto a bus and off a bus is a feat - but wow.  Hopefully he will be able to make it through such a long day (8:35 - 4:45) without melting down either at school or at home.  We shall see.  Worst case scenario is that I might end up picking him up at the end of the day to prevent the crazy long ride.

But for now, I am enjoying a pumpkin spice coffee and cuddles with my littlest.  I am going to enjoy the less stressful mornings and extra time alone with him while Little Man gets his learning on.

The One Where I Got To Practice

Last week was an adventure to be sure!  We had a great time grilling out on Saturday with our families and a few of my girlfriends to celebrate Baby Vegas.   Food, chocolate, gossip, and gifts - what's not to love?!  I was so excited to have everyone over I seriously overdid it on the standing and running around, and paid for it dearly the next day.  I spent most of Sunday in bed with sore feet and an aching back.

Me and Hubs!

Monday and Tuesday one of my girlfriends needed a sitter for her little one while she worked.  Her daughter is five months old and the cutest thing I've ever seen, so I jumped at the chance to watch her.  Of course, Monday was astonishingly easy... she ate, she giggled, she slept, she smelled so good I wanted to eat her (Little Man, I love you, but you smell like a Big Kid)... after her momma picked her up I called my own mom and bragged about how I was the baby whisperer.  No really.  I was a freakin' genius with the babies.  I even managed to cook and do laundry. YOU GUYS BABIES ARE SO EASY!

Then it was Tuesday.  And the baby came back for Round 2. Which she won, hands down. She was still really cute, she smelled good, she was really snuggly...  But she didn't have her magical go-to-sleep-binky.  So she didn't sleep.  She just wanted to be held, or she would cry.  Which made my Little Man cry and cling to my leg in response to the noise.  Which made my dog bark at the insanity of two crying ickle beasties.  YOU GUYS BABIES ARE SO HARD!   So my husband came home early from work arrived in the nick of time so we could divide and conquer the tiny humans. [And I should note here that if I hadn't already been pregnant, the sight of my husband cooing at and carrying a tiny little baby would have gotten me knocked up immediately.]  When I talked to my mother that night I implied that perhaps I will be letting Baby Vegas stay in my womb until he is two or three and I am ready to take care of him.

So the rest of the week seemed uneventful after my babysitting adventures.  I had an OB checkup where I found out I am finally gaining weight - 4 lbs in two weeks!  Yikes!  It actually still leaves me under where the "average" weight gain is for 32 weeks (+13 overall) but I am not really thrilled it is all showing up so fast!  If I look at my weekly pictures though I can tell I've finally "popped" and gotten that preggo-belly, so hopefully that's where I put most of the poundage.

See!  Belly-time!

Then on Friday the baby girl came back over for a lunch date (with her mom and another friend of mine), and was such a precious little angel I decided I would let Baby Vegas come out of the womb on time after all.  Not to mention it is getting seriously crowded in there... he is a pushy little fellow!  His kicks and movements are almost sharp, and very aggressive - I definitely don't remember them being like that with Little Man.

So overall, baby-sitting was a great success.  I got to help out a great friend of mine, snuggle with a cute baby, and remember that despite the occasional rough patch with a little one, it is all worth it when they smile at you and fall asleep.  I cannot wait to have a sweet-smelling bundle of newborn baby in my arms come August.   And I will definitely be baby-sitting again sometime, although perhaps I will not be so quick to name myself Baby Whisperer...

Snuggling Into My *Organized* Nest

I get a serious high every time I walk into my old office and see how clean and organized it all is... over the last few days I've been just wandering in and turning on the lights for no reason.  Hubs is tolerating this little burst of crazy with surprising good humor, considering how loudly I squeal every time and how I make him oooh and ahhh with me if he's nearby.

All of the cleaning and organizing we've been up to has inspired me to try to be organized in other parts of our lives lately.  I've finally finished Little Man's medical binder after oh... about four years of thinking about having one.  It is a 3 inch binder completely filled with information on every doctor's visit, therapy session, medical bill, and referral we've had over the last nearly five years.  Ideally I think I want to streamline it a little more and get rid of some of the older reports that are less important to be dragging from place to place, but for now it is done and going to be a huge help in scheduling and keeping track of what needs to happen and when.

I've also been being much better about our menu-planning and grocery shopping.  Every Tuesday night for the last month I've been sitting down (with Hubs if he's around) and cross-checking coupons and sales at our local grocery store.  Then with those in mind, I make a weekly meal plan and shop accordingly on Wednesday afternoon when all the sales start.  With our switch to more clean-eating and less processed food, we'd been slacking a lot with our couponing and we'd seen a rise in our monthly grocery spending.  Now that I'm taking the time to plan and do some basic couponing the night before each trip, we've managed to get our weekly bill down to the same amount of spending we'd been doing when we couponed, plus we're eating much healthier and I'd say about 80% clean.

Between all that and managing to get several of Little Man's major appointments scheduled and/or completed, I've been feeling like a champ lately.  I'm trying to savor this flood of energy while I have it, because I know myself and I know how easily I fall into a lazy rut if I let myself.  Plus, I vaguely remember being a complete couch-potato during my third trimester last pregnancy, and I'm not sure how much of that was laziness or necessity.  Back to work!!

Still in the pre-pregnancy jeans.  Gotta love "super-low rise" pants!

 

Bed Wars - (And Forgive Me, I Have No Idea What Number This Is)

Little Man is a couple months away from his fifth birthday, and it is time to really, really, take away the crutch that is his crib.  We tried once before to take away the crib, but it just resulted in a few nights of terrified wakeups by Little Man when he discovered he was in his room but not in his crib.  Screams of terror at 3 AM for a week = parents relenting and putting the crib back in the room.

To recap the last few months of Bed-Wars... We attempted to make it harder for LM to get out of the crib by removing the springs that held up the mattress, and placing the mattress directly on the floor with the crib around it.  That didn't help at all.  A few months ago he perfected his tuck and roll technique and now can escape the crib in less than 30 seconds.  A shove on the baby gate and he was downstairs in the morning waiting to greet me with a smile on his face and destruction all over the living room.

So finally we resorted to what I really hadn't wanted to try - locking the door.  And when he figured out that he could use his teeth to unlock the door, we flipped the doorknob around and now it locks from the outside.  Which is actually safer anyways, so I'm not too upset about that, its just the whole "Little Man can unlock doors with his teeth" thing that makes me nervous.  His therapist was actually pleased to find out that Little Man is such a "problem solver", as it is a very nice developmental milestone.  But back to the bed...

As of Monday night, Little Man officially transitioned with relative ease into his "big boy bed".

Thomas Themed sheets for maximum awesomeness.

The bed looks cute and everything, and the white pads cover up the worst of the teeth marks on the sides as an added bonus.  But practical?  Not even close.  The only thing this bed is good for is a good starting spot for laying Little Man's head at night.  It is not going to prevent wandering in the morning, it isn't going to prevent him from getting up during the night and playing with the blinds and his latest obsession - the closet door.  [We're actually getting a lock for that door too, because all the safety knobs in the world haven't been able to prevent him from opening his closet.]

His case worker is now giving us doom-and-gloom speeches about how slowly government assistance works, and trying to convince me that I need to look into other alternatives to the Monroe bed that we have been working towards for almost a year.  I got a call from her after her latest visit this Tuesday for a follow-up regarding the bed, and had I not been playing Candy Crush to relax after a long day of therapies and home visits, she would have seen me fly into a blind rage.

What set me off was when she recommended that I look into the Nickel Bed, which I have known about since July of 2012 when we started this whole process.  Apparently while looking around the internet after our home visit a few hours prior she found out about the Nickel and was trying to sell me on how great the bed would work for Little Man.  So when I said I was willing to try the Nickel [which during my research back then I had realized would probably be too weak for Little Man's teething and ripping issue], I asked how long it would take the state to approve funds for this less expensive option vs. the $2k+ Monroe bed.

"Oh but THIS bed is ONLY $159, plus shipping.  So you can just get that one."

I'm sorry but what?  Maybe I'm overreacting here, but since when is $159 just spare change that a family of a special needs child with a baby on the way has lying around??  I know that you are doing a home visit, and things look nice and clean and my husband has a job while I stay home.  But how do you have the nerve to act like I can just drop that kind of money on a bed that I'm not even convinced will be a viable solution?  You don't think if I had thought we could afford to experiment with a "cheap" bed tent that we would have done that ten months ago???

While I know that she is trying to be helpful, I can't help but be angry.  I want to shake her and show her how hard we work every day to keep Little Man safe and happy, how much we actually have to spend to accommodate his needs that we can't get through any kind of insurance or assistance.  This was the one thing we knew we needed help with, the one thing we'd asked for help for - and to be just blithely told that we should buy the bed ourselves and move forward is so frustrating.  I wouldn't have jumped through the ridiculous hoops to get into this program if it wasn't for this damn bed, and now it feels like it has all been for nothing.  

Instead of flipping out and screaming in frustration at my cell phone, I calmly said we would not be purchasing a Nickel bed and we would continue to wait for the Monroe that may never come.  She seemed slightly taken aback by my not immediately jumping for joy at her plan, but then backtracked into discussing other things.

To be fair, it wasn't really just her assuming that we have money to throw around that had me angry.  Ex and I had a very intense talk last weekend about the same thing, and so it was already a sore spot for me when this came up.  In the time it has taken me to edit and post this, re-reading my frustration with her really is like reading a list about my frustrations lately with the Ex.  Don't get me wrong, I'm still annoyed with her.  But after some distance from the phone call and a good nights sleep, I am simply annoyed and not "raging" (as my Facebook status had indicated immediately after the call.)

So that is the latest bed update.  I'm getting up the energy to write about our latest couple of appointments, which were basically hell on Earth.  For now though, I'm off to watch the ten-thousandth episode of "Super Why", the latest household obsession.  Also a kind of hell on Earth.  :)

Sleep is for the weak

I am already on overload this week, and my fuse is oh-so-short.  Despite my early predictions for a lazy week, it's been a stressful couple of days.

Monday night when Hubs came home we sat down to tackle the paperwork that Little Man's therapy coordinator had sent home with me.  Of course, I'd glanced at it in the office and tucked it away knowing that it would be a lengthy process once we got home - but I had no idea.  There were nine different developmental questionnaires, some of them several pages long.  One survey had almost 300 questions.  And 85% of the surveys were full of questions not developmentally applicable to Little Man. Many of the questions focused on his verbal reactions to things, which because he is non-verbal were fairly impossible to answer.  

Either way, they had to be filled out to the "best of our ability"... and so for 2.5 hours Hubs and I slaved away at the surveys.  Then we both crawled into bed and tried to turn off our brains for a few precious hours of sleep.  

Little Man woke up the next morning at five am, and then decided he would be awake for the day. Which meant I got nothing done til afternoon because I was a zombie.  But car insurance (I saved a BUNCH of money switching to 'married' and getting joint insurance with Hubs) paperwork had to be worked out, then Little Man was a hot mess because he refused to nap... til around 4:45 when he passed out on the couch for an hour.  Greaaaaaaat.  You know what that meant?  It meant that he wasn't going to sleep at night, no matter how tired we all were from our day.  

So even though Little Man was in bed at 9:30, he was awake til after 1 am.  Which meant I stayed up and worried that he was getting into trouble in his room, and was checking on him every half hour to make sure his diaper was still on and the stuffed animals were all still stuffed.  At 1 am I finally gave up and went to bed myself.  Well, I did after waking up Hubs and worrying that Little Man spending hours staring at crib walls at night is stunting his development.  Hubs sleepily stated that I am no longer allowed to read the internet and to go to bed.  

Little Man was up at 8 this morning, despite probably not sleeping much last night.  At this point, I can't really track his sleep accurately because I sleep more than he does.  I am at the end of my rope.  I want a better answer to his sleep problems than "lets just close him up in his room and he'll either sleep or not."

This all just means that today I am wishing for a giant cup of coffee, or a nap.   I can't have either, and so I'm cranky.  But life goes on, apparently I still need to grocery shop and make food, maybe even see a friend or two on their days off this week.  

April Truth

Welcome to April, the month where nothing happens and the weather is ridiculous.

This last week has been a whirlwind of activity - a couple of therapy appointments for Little Man, the Passover dinner we went to (the food was amazing, the company awesome), and then Easter which we split between Hubs' family during the day and mine at night.  For awhile it felt like we never stopped moving!  This week promises to be a lot more laid back, which I am absolutely ready for right about now.

Therapy has been going well for Little Man.  He seems to be liking the new PT, and she is willing to work around his little quirks.  You know, where he can't walk too far from the t.v. and he needs constant fruit-snack rewards.  We're down to maybe one or two mini-tantrums a lesson, which is a huge improvement from last year when the lesson was a giant tantrum the full time.  

At his behavioral appointment, his doctor seems pretty concerned right now for poor LM's teeth.  The chewing/biting/gnawing is out of control, and there is nothing we seem to be able to do to stop it.  He gave him another Chewy Tube which he loves, but it still doesn't distract him from the fact that everything looks so delicious nom nom nom!  Even with the Chewy Tubes and designated chewable toys, Easter weekend alone had him chomping on the following non-edible items;

* The side of the dining room table at the Easter brunch

* The decorative pillows on Grandma's couch

* The bottom of the one remaining sippy cup that does not leak

* The edges of his DVD player, and also the electrical cord that powers it

So we've got another appointment in two weeks to see the doctor again and talk about how the attempts at distracting LM from "non approved" chewing objects works out.  That, in addition to the miles of paperwork I have to do to prep for his IEP and therapy evaluations with his coordinator (I have over thirty pages of diagnostics and forms), setting up visits with ortho/hemo/dentist/pediatrician, and then my own appointments to follow up on Baby Vegas - whew.  I guess I really need to redefine "laid back"... at least for this week it means that most of this I can do with a phone glued to my ear, laptop on my lap, and stuck on the couch...

Monday Ramblings

It's finally snowing??  On March 25th?  I'm not even the tiniest bit excited by this.  I am so ready for Spring weather, lighter clothes, no jackets, and flip flops.  It somehow is infinitely easier to wiggle an almost 5 year old into his car seat when you don't have to whip off his bulky jacket or shield his head from the rain and icy wind.

As of yesterday, Baby Vegas and I are cruisin' along at nineteen weeks - and we're in the honeymoon phase for sure!  I feel BV kicking and swimming all the time, and I have a little belly, but other than that it is hard to remember that I'm really going to have a baby in 21 weeks!!  Well, except when I want sushi and wine.  Which is kind of always.  I always want sushi and wine.

Check out my haircut, it's my favorite part of the photo.

I haven't bothered to take the 19 week picture yet.  So this picture at 18 weeks is the most recent "belly shot".  I've been pretty lazy in regards to pregnancy documenting, so I haven't even done a baby book this time.  I assume this means I'll have a girl, and she will  be horrified that all of her friends have detailed baby books and timelines of their growth in their momma's belly from Pinterest -and I was a slacker.  But it will be a life lesson for her - some people suck, and sometimes it is the people you love.  So there isn't anything you can do about it, you have to love them anyways.  Now check out these sweet Instagram photos of what I was eating while I was pregnant with you - that's entertainment!

Today is Passover.  Or tonight is, or something.  Everything I know about Passover I learned from the Illustrated Children's Bible in 1997 - so I am a little hazy on the details.  Also I am Christian by birth, Episcopalian by marriage. (I confirmed that with Hubs before I typed it, we aren't very observant if you can't tell.)  But Hubs, Little Man, and I got invited to a Passover dinner tonight and so I am trying to brush up on the details before I head out.  In semi-related news, Hubs was horrified to find out recently that I have never been baptized - way to go Mom!  That is way worse than not giving your kid a baby book.  Of course, Little Man isn't baptized either.  So apparently at some point in the near future we are all getting a good sprinkle of holy water *just in case*.  I hope this doesn't ruin seating arrangements upstairs (I mean WAYYY upstairs) because I am fairly sure my sister and brother will not be getting baptized and I am hoping we all can still hang out together in the great beyond.  Then again, if the "lets plan to get you baptized" takes as long as the "lets plan to clean the storage room and the baby's room and your office"... I probably have a few years to worry about it.

That was a passive aggressive hint to my husband that we still haven't done anything to the mess in this house.   I wonder if he's waiting until I am too big to move around and help him at all.  Maybe he wants to spare me the hard work?  Hmmm...

On that note, I am going to get back to laying on the couch watching Thomas the Tank Engine and listening to Hubs type away for work. I have priorities.

Short and Sweet

I'm trying to be productive this week since I have about a baskillion household chores to catch up on.  Somehow we ran out of laundry detergent and dish soap so everything seems extra dirty.  I did manage to vacuum up a layer or three of dirt from the downstairs carpets, and clean the bathrooms.  So I count that as a win, and now I get to relax right?

Little Man got a sweet haircut early this week and inspired me to get my own hair done - he looks awesome, I am a little nervous.  Because my best friend's first reaction was "Wow, you're your mom."  Oh boy.

Little Man also started some new PT home therapy this week.  He only threw one major tantrum, and then there was a slightly awkward moment where he knew the therapist had fruit snacks hidden so he started trying to kiss her to get her to give them to him.  I mean, it works when I have fruit snacks he wants...

We might have to work on boundaries, asap.

Finally, Baby Vegas is 16 weeks old!  He's avocado sized and has fingernails.  I am having round ligament pains anytime I push myself too hard, so it has made me very disinterested in household chores.  And we're back to the beginning...

The One With A 90's Flashback

We all remember these right?

So sexy.   Ahem.

At least I do.  I think tearaway pants were really awesome when I was in the 6th grade or so.  Or maybe they were never awesome, but I was twelve so...

Anyways.  Little Man has a new "thing" lately.  His thing is to pretend that diapers are tearaway pants.  Like the cool kids of the 90's, he grabs hold of the diaper and rips it away from his body.  Screw pants!  WHO NEEDS PANTS?

Um.  You do Little Man, you do.  You cannot keep taking off your diaper and letting it hide in your pants leg.  And then peeing all over yourself and/or my house.  It's not cool.  It is actually super duper gross and very stressful.  Every time I hug you I have to double check you're all tucked in, and then if you aren't I have to run around the house sniffing my furniture.  We're running an extra load of laundry every couple days because you can't keep your pants on!

So if anyone has ideas besides duct tape, let me know.  The converted jammies he wears aren't doing the trick for this one.  I'm thinking maybe plastic furniture - that's still cool right?

Just Another Day...

Today my master-plan was to make myself a big breakfast and then get to work baking - if I felt like it.  I have homemade English muffins and granola on the list, and if there is time, some whole wheat zucchini muffins.

I woke up to the usual banging and slamming of doors that mean my toddler had escaped from his baby prison and was hungry.  So I shuffled off to make sure he scooted down the stairs without hurting himself, mumbling encouragement through my toothbrush bristles.  I brewed coffee while slapping on his fresh diaper, and threw bacon and eggs in a frying pan while simultaneously turning on Caillou and skipping the "bad parts".

It was the usual lazy grey morning, and when I finally sat down with my cup of coffee and breakfast sandwich I noticed the sweet love note written for me by Hubs.  Less than two months til our wedding, and he thinks I'm great.  I'm summing up cause... well... it's personal.  Hahaha.

I know that as a full-time homemaker and momma sometimes my relationship with Hubs is sidelined.  We get into a rut of making sure the house is running smoothly, the kid is clean and fed, the pets are alive, and our weekends are jammed with as much fun as possible.  I think overall I remember to appreciate Hubs and all that he does, but mornings like this make me want to do something extra special to let him know that I'm thinking of him too.  Let's face it, sometimes (at least once monthly) I'm a total pain in the ass. 

So today instead of having Hubs come home to me in my pajamas and folding some laundry, I'm going to put on a cute outfit and do my makeup, so we can go out tonight. 

We're going to the grocery store.

Ya gotta be realistic here folks.